More cookbook hideousness

I’m back with more tasty examples of cookbook insanity. I was flipping through my copy of The Salads Coobook: Southern Living Progressive Farmer, just to see if there was anything else that struck my fancy. Or morbidly fascinated me.

Now I have a new category: Hideous Recipe Names, or “Who Thought This Sounded Good?”

  1. Congealed Corned Beef Salad (p. 26) Doesn’t “congealed” just start your mouth a-watering?
  2. Asparagus-Meat Mold (p. 27) Want a little penicillin with your asparagus and mystery meat?
  3. Mobile Ham Salad (p. 14) Where is it going? How will it get there?
  4. Liver Salad (p. 36) [shudder]
  5. Mexican Shrimp Salad with Peanuts (p. 70) Mexican. Shrimp. Peanuts. Maybe I’d like Thai Shrimp Salad with Peanuts.
  6. Cottage Cheese-Asparagus Mousse (p. 91) You know, I like asparagus. I’d rather spare it from a state of mush.
  7. Iceberg Borscht Salad (p. 93) I… I have no words.
  8. Luau Coleslaw (p. 130) Because you know you missed coleslaw on that Hawaiian vacation.
  9. Stuffed Prune and Orange Salad (p. 133) Do you want to know what the prunes are stuffed with? Do you really?
  10. Hot Pineapple-Yam Salad (p. 134) Is THAT what I’ve been craving?
  11. Frozen Salad Loaf (p. 168) I think “loaf” is perhaps the most unappetizing word one can use to describe any food (aside from bread, of course).

I should take this opportunity to explain (for anyone uninitiated into the realm of southern salad preparation) that “salad” does not necessarily mean:

  • vegetable-based,
  • uncooked,
  • vegetable-inclusive, or
  • healthy.

One of my favorite childhood “salads” was Coke salad, which was primarily composed of canned sweet cherries, cola, pecans, sugar and gelatin. Mm; nothing like a nice healthy salad to round out a holiday meal. (I still like it, but now I eat it as dessert.)

When I think about it, perhaps “Coke salad” belongs up there at #12. But that’ll have to wait for a cookbook that actually holds the recipe.


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3 Responses to “More cookbook hideousness”

  1. Dixie Says:

    I have been craving Coke Salad for 4 years. Somebody send me the recipe! Doesn’t it have whipped cream on it too? Or is that something else?

  2. fractone Says:

    I think that’s one of the other infamous buffet salads. I remember one that was green (maybe from pistachio pudding?) that had pecans, marshmallows, whipped cream and coconut(?) in it. I have NO idea what the name is, though. It was tasty, too.

    Do you think other people actually eat these salads, or is it just our family?

  3. Dixie Says:

    I think that’s ambrosia salad, it usually has pineapple pieces too. There is actually an alternative ambrosia salad recipe on the inside of our current yogurt container. And, no, it’s not just our family. I think it is more of a southern thing, though. But, besides tuna salad & chicken salad, I don’t think I want to try any with meat. Kinda makes me gag. My grandma-in-law used to make this amazing orange salad that I have been trying to perfect for years. I’ve almost got it.

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